Dating Report Week Seven

No report.  I actually had important shit to do last week, and didn’t have the extra time or energy to waste e-mailing women who are likely to ignore or reject me anyway.  I did re-write the “About Me” section of my profile, though.  Comments and/or criticism welcome.

I won’t waste time feeding you all the same tired adjectives that every other profile here uses.  Suffice it to say that I’m one of the good guys.

I like boring.  I’ve flown airplanes, but you’ll never catch me jumping out of a perfectly good one.

I’m a gun guy.  I’ve been shooting since I was six and reloading my own ammunition since I was fifteen.  I own a shotgun, a few rifles, and several handguns.  I do not hunt, but I do target shoot regularly.  I’ve been licensed to carry a concealed handgun since the mid-1990’s, and I routinely carry for self-defense.

One of my goals is to be as self-sufficient as possible.  I might be stuck living in the suburbs, but I have a garden every year.  I freeze or can whatever I do not use immediately.  I raise rabbits for meat.  I have a small amount of bulk food stored, as well as the means to filter and purify water.

I’m childless by choice.  I like to think that I would have been a good father, but I decided to let that remain a mystery.  Don’t hesitate to contact me if you have children, though.  I was good with my many nieces and nephews while they were growing up.  Just don’t expect me to always know exactly what to say or do in every scenario.

I like to eat.  As a result, I’m about 15% heavier now than during my time in the Air Force.  Don’t worry, I’m healthy, and I don’t weigh nearly enough to get onto The Biggest Loser.

I like giving and receiving affection and attention.  I won’t smother you, though.  I need “me” time every so often, too.

I’m not big on social events.  I avoid crowds, and prefer to spend time alone or in small groups.

I’m looking for a serious relationship (eventually), not a casual hookup or friends-with-benefits arrangement.  No smokers, please.

Thank you for taking the time to read my profile. I hope to hear from you soon.

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4 Responses to Dating Report Week Seven

  1. skidmarkva says:

    You put the goods in the window and expect everybody to flock there to stare at them oohing and ahhing. Trouble is, there are a bazillion other windows full of goods out there. Some of the other folks who put their goods in the window also did something called advertising, which I fear you do not understand and in fact may find morally reprehensible. Yes, you described the goods, but there is only one mention of why they are what anyone would want to select over the bazillion others being offered – you won’t smother anyone who takes a flier on you. Is that your best feature? The one you are using to lure wimmins to your door? I’ll bet you also think that by putting a bare hook into the water fish ought to know they are supposed to impale their mouth parts on said hook.

    Let me know if I’m being too subtle here.

    stay safe.

    • alaskan454 says:

      First of all, thank you for the feedback.

      You, subtle? I’m not sure you know the definition of the word, much less possess the ability to demonstrate it.

      So, I’m supposed to offer up the same line of bullshit that every other swinging dick uses?

      I actually tried that in versions 2.0 and 2.1, and it didn’t work. For version 3.0, I figured I’d try something new. Offer a breath of fresh air by /not/ trying to blow smoke up their asses.

      Nice, kind, loyal, caring, honest, compassionate, no games, no drama, love walks on the beach, watching the sunset, blah, blah, blah, BS, BS, BS. Everybody knows it’s a crock of shit, including the jackass who wrote it. Everybody wants to be like that, but nobody really is all those things all the time. Some of them, some of the time, but that’s about as good as it gets.

      For the record, I suck at fishing, too – despite not using a bare hook.

  2. Jin Chiang says:

    So, skidmarkva, not only does he have to be not creepy and sweaty, but he has to do something phenomenal to distinguish himself from the rest of the plebeian masses? *Roll eyes*

    Hey, Grumpy, you forgot you used to be the door gunner on the space shuttle. :-7 God, online dating erodes confidence like nothing else.

    Did Bea ever get back to you? Or that Canadian gal? Or are they the one and the same? She was suppose to usher in a golden age, a renaissance era, where girls threw themselves at you after she learned ya in the finer arts of composing a profile, right? Well, you can at least boast about the distinction of attracting women with, ummm, strong personalities here.

    • alaskan454 says:

      Thanks for the support. I never expected it to be easy, but damn.

      Bea was the Canadian gal, and no, she never made it back to share her awesome insights and amazing wisdom.

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