Dating Report Week Five

I decided to change my strategy this week.  Erin commented on a previous post about a single male friend of hers who is similarly frustrated, and shared the form letter that he has started using.  I blatantly copied it, made a few minor tweaks, and started sending it out.  Here it is:


I’ll be honest.  Crafting specific, unique messages to ladies who can’t be bothered to perform the basic courtesy of writing back is a waste of my time.  After a few dozen, I’ve decided to quit.

So, you get a form letter where I say, “I think you’re interesting and I would like to know more about you. Please read my profile, and then kindly observe the social contract to write me back, even if it’s only to say ‘no thanks’.”

Have a great day.

I sent this letter to ten ladies this week.  I did not waste my time on winks or flirts.

Seven of the ten read my e-mail.  One responded.  She said:

I am sure you are a really nice guy, but your e-mail came off as very bitter and angry. In the future, you might want to try not punishing women you’d like to get to know for the mistakes of other women. Thanks for the e-mail, but no thanks.

I sent her a brief reply, thanking her for being kind enough to actually respond.  I guess she’s blocking me, because she never read it.

It seems as though my various approaches all net the same results.  Not sure what I’ll do next week.

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15 Responses to Dating Report Week Five

  1. Craig says:

    There are worse things than being single.

  2. Erin Palette says:

    Look at it this way: You didn’t spend any effort, and aren’t any worse off for it (because who’s to say they would have responded to a nice letter? Not past performance, if that’s any indication).

    But isn’t it odd how politeness gets you ignored, but a slightly rude form letter gets you a reply? This is a crazy world.

    Speaking of crazy, did crazy vegan leftist Canadian chick (but I repeat myself) ever get back to you on that dating profile critique?

    • alaskan454 says:

      The letters certainly took less time last week.

      I’m running about the same response percentage – one in seven wrote back this week, four out of the first twenty-five (not including this week) replied. It certainly isn’t any worse.

      No, Ms. Canada never made it back, or if she did, she didn’t comment any more. I guess she got bored when the crazy, racist, gun-totin’ redneck Murrican didn’t respond with all manner of vileness (or whatever she was expecting).

  3. skidmarkva says:

    “Hi. I’m really a nice guy once you get to know me, but right now I’m a bit frustrated that I seem not to be able to show any women that side of me. This whole meet-market thing has got to be way harder than learning astrophysics on a unicycle in a hurricane, and I’ve probably made a bunch of errors in how I’m going about it. But I’m really a nice guy once you get to know me – but I am not pathetic or desparate. I’d like to meet someone who has at least as much to give as I do.

    “So – If you have any interest in getting to know a really nice guy who is hoping that whoever he meets is ___ and ___ and __ then respond. If you would rather just tell me why you think I keep getting no response from women whose profiles say they are looking for a guy that I just might be, I’ll welcome that, too.”

    I double-dog dare you to post that. I’ll spring for a six-pack of your favorite brew for sulking if that totally bombs after 14 days.

    stay safe.

  4. Garand Gal says:

    LOL I wrote up a little sample paragraph where you could fill in the blanks too but managed to erase it in my cough syrup befuddled haze. I think it went something like “Hi! Thanks for checking out my profile. I’m a working stiff stuck in suburbia whose goal is a self sufficient lifestyle. Some of the projects I’m focusing on right now are expanding my gardens, raising rabbits and learning to navigate the pitfalls of an HOA (or online dating). It hasn’t been easy but I’m determined to figure it out! If you like homegrown tomatoes and hard working guys, why don’t you respond and we can get together and compare notes over coffee?” and then you could include pictures of you shooting at the range, or one of you standing with your gun next to a target proudly showing your groupings, holding one of the bunnies (for some reason i think it would be more appealing if it were a self taken picture of your hand petting it or of it with your arm holding it in the background rather than you standing there with a rabbit in your hands), and other candid shots of you cooking, produce from the garden, doing whatever puts a smile on your face and a light in your eyes.
    I see that I was beaten to it though LOL Well done, skidmark!

    • Erin Palette says:

      Ooh, I like this one. A lot. You can use it as a form letter but not advertise it as such.

    • alaskan454 says:

      I love this. Yes, skid did good, but I think I’ll try some version of both. At least I’ll have fun with it, and the response can’t be any worse. Thank you!

  5. Wraith says:

    “I am sure you are a really nice guy, but your e-mail came off as very bitter and angry.”

    She thinks THAT’S ‘bitter and angry?’ Good thing she didn’t read your blog…!! 😉

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