Leave Me Alone

I closed a post last week with the Jefferson Davis quote:

All we ask is to be left alone.

I used it in the context of the HOA sticking their fucking nose into my business, specifically, my rabbits.  One could legitimately argue that if my wish were really to be left alone, I shouldn’t have purchased a home in a development with a homeowners association.

I have no counter to this argument.  I could go into the reasons why I chose to buy where I did, in spite of the existence of a HOA, but that is all moot at this point.

While I believe in the right of state and local government doing whatever the hell they want to do without interference from the fucktards in Washington DC, none of their actions should interfere with basic human rights.

I have the right to keep and bear arms, so no rule or law (even at the federal level, but that’s a rant for another day) should infringe in the least on that.

I have the right to eat, so no local law or HOA rule should restrict my ability to feed myself as long as no bona fide nuisance exists.  I can understand why they might not want me to raise a cow or a flock of roosters on a sub-quarter acre city lot.  I also don’t imagine that my neighbors would appreciate it if I grew corn in my front yard.

But rabbits?  Give me a fucking break!  They make no noise.  They have minimal smell, even if one does not clean up after them for a couple weeks.  At the present time, I have one adult male, one adult female, and the juveniles from a single litter.

I will never have more than two litters at any one time.  A new litter may arrive a few weeks before the juveniles from the previous litter are old enough to butcher, but that’s it.  I do not, nor will I ever have an excessive number, and I do not sell any.  So, why in the hell should any level of government have the right to take food out of my mouth based on some perceived yet nonexistent nuisance?

And vegetable gardens?   Yes, vegetable gardens are against the rules, under certain circumstances.  The covenants state that gardens are permitted as long as they are not visible from the street.  Well, my tomatoes and cucumbers can be seen from the street if you look for them, simply because of their height.  So, technically, they are illegal in the community.  (Yes, illegal.  In my state, HOA rules are authorized by statute.)  Hell, you can see the outline of the raised (slightly, <12″) beds that everything grows in, so if you want to get all “letter of the law” about it, the whole fucking thing is verboten.

The HOA Cunt™ has not yet written me up for the garden, but I wouldn’t put it past her to do so this year.  If she does, my response will likely require a court appearance.

I bitch about the HOA rules.  I whine about how high my state’s gas taxes are.  I complain about how we are one of few states where one cannot under any circumstances legally carry a sidearm into an establishment that serves alcohol on the premises unless you are the proprietor or an authorized employee.  Or, of course, a member of the nobility law enforcement.

Don’t get your fucking panties in a wad.  I am not anti-law enforcement until they start shitting on my rights.  I just have a huge problem when so many laws include clauses to the effect of. “… except law enforcement officers, government employees, politicians, and a whole slew of other named classes of folks who are better than you common peasants and therefore do not have to obey the same laws that you do.”

Why don’t I just move to a freer state?  They do exist.  Alaska.  Montana.  Wyoming. Texas, even though they do still outlaw open carry.  Hell, even Vermont is freer in most respects.

Well, I’m working on it.  I manage some rental property in a western state, and there has been at least one vacant residential unit on the property ever since my involvement began back in 2006.

The only state with a lower total gas tax is Alaska.

No permit is required to carry a handgun, either openly or concealed, although they do issue permits for reciprocity purposes.  There are almost no prohibitions on where one can carry under state law – with the usual exceptions that apply everywhere under federal law (spit!).

The problem is that the population of the entire county is only about fifteen thousand, with well over half of those live in the county seat, which is an hour away.

This means no jobs.  No jobs means no way to pay those things that cannot be avoided, such as real estate taxes, even if I were to manage near-absolute self-sufficiency.

The property is inside the limits of a small town, which means that there are some restrictions on livestock.  These restrictions are nowhere as asinine as those in place courtesy of the HOA here, of course.  Rabbits and even goats are no problem, but large (cows) or noisy (chickens) animals are out.

The growing season is much shorter than I am accustomed to, but I am fairly certain that I could find short-season varieties of most of the things that I grow, or incorporate a greenhouse or even hydroponics to make up for any loss.

There are also thirty-five acres of raw land in a neighboring county that would be ideal, except that I don’t have the funds to dig a well and put up wind turbines, much less to build on it.

Believe me, if I can find a way, I’m gone,  Especially if I find myself without a wife next week.  Well, I guess I should say, “If my wife moves to another continent next week.”  If that happens, I ain’t getting married again, ever, so I’ll be in no hurry to get the divorce.  It just involves giving the state more money, and I have better uses for it than they do.

Granted, if I move out there and the supervolcano underneath of Yellowstone erupts, I’m fucked. But then again, so is most of the western United States.

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17 Responses to Leave Me Alone

  1. Akgrrrl says:

    Well if you come to Alaska remember it’s -30 on the Kenai right now and -9 in Anchorage 😦
    up north is even colder. There’s jobs in and near the cities but not killer paying ones.

  2. alaskan454 says:

    I’ve thought about Alaska, but at least in Wyoming, there is an abbreviated growing season. Alaska would require a well-insulated greenhouse or hydroponics, neither of which are within my price range. As much as I love meat, I have to have some taters to go with it.

    Plus, after living in a near-subtropical climate for most of the last couple decades, me and cold simply don’t get along.

    • Akgrrrl says:

      I gee a ton of veggies last summer:) potatoes, carrots, leeks, Swiss chard, spinach and peas! As well as raspberries. I just planted some cold hardy apple trees and a self fertile cherry tree… I’ll keep you posted if they survived this winter lol.

      • Akgrrrl says:

        *grew… Stupid Iphone lol

      • alaskan454 says:

        I knew what you meant. 🙂

        Are you sure it was the iphone? It couldn’t have possibly been the operator, could it? (Sorry, I’m an asshole, and I just couldn’t resist the open door.)

      • alaskan454 says:

        I guess I should do some research before I open my mouth and prove just how ignorant I really am. But -30?!? That’ll damn near freeze helium. I hope I’m wrong, but I don’t expect your trees to survive.

  3. agirlandhergun says:

    I dislike HOA”s as well. I am pretty low key, so not much of their ridiculous rules effect me, but we can have a garden either. I have a large backyard and they do not want me to put up a garden box and grow things, not even flowers actually. I have to grow them in individual pots. A bit too controlling and we too are looking for a way out, but it takes time, so we just deal and plan and one day, we will be a little bit closer to the freedom we should all have, you know to go insane and grow a tomato.

    • alaskan454 says:

      No garden box? What the hell? Fucking self-important jackasses. I’m beginning to think Critter’s position on HOAs is a good one.

    • mortalis09 says:

      Lol maybe you should consider somewhere like Winchester (well Frederick county actually) – cheap as heck compared to most of the state and VERY few hoa’s + the local ordinances are pretty tame. oh and gas is cheaper lol

      • alaskan454 says:

        The problem with relocating is a place to live. Here, the place is paid for. The ex and I own it jointly, so unless we both leave, we can’t sell it. I can’t afford a place worth living in on eight bucks an hour, so the rental property out west, which is also jointly-owned and paid for, is my only other real option. Until a real job can be found, anyway. Thanks for the suggestion, though.

      • mortalis09 says:

        drop me an e-mail if you feel like it, there are jobs available up here that pay fairly well – if you would like since i have almost nothing but time atm i can see what i can find out for ya

      • Beth says:

        im in stephens city and the hoa wont quit fucking with us owners by the way hes allowed to be a fag and I cant put trash out til 7 well what can I do to get their attention , just to say quit fucking with me

      • alaskan454 says:

        It depends on how the HOA covenants are written, but in most cases, they are within the letter of the law, even if they are dicks. Which most people in HOA “leadership” tend to by. Read the covenants to make sure that what you’re being required to do is permissible, and if you have any recourse besides moving. Good luck.

  4. Critter says:

    i’ll live in a single wide next door to meth freaks before i live with an HOA.

    • alaskan454 says:

      I’m beginning to think that you’re on to something there.

    • mortalis09 says:

      been there done that – also lived w/ an HOA in cali – lol at least the dopers tend to leave you alone when they know your armed

      • alaskan454 says:

        …at least the dopers tend to leave you alone when they know your armed…

        Yes, they do. I had the unfortunate experience of living in a neighborhood where recreational pharmaceutical sales was big business. The crazy-assed cracker up the block never got bothered, because a couple times a week I found an excuse to do something outside when plenty of folks were around. Mowing the yard? Glock model 20 clearly visible. Changing the oil in the car? Ditto. Regular readers who see this may ask, “Glock?”

        Yes. I ain’t dirtying up the Alaskan and my purty custom leather holster with yard work or car repair. Plus, in a target rich environment, fifteen rounds of 10mm was a bit more comforting than 6 from the hand cannon, although the difference in combined ballistic energy per reload is <0.5%.

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